d4nd3l10n
4th May 2011, 21:15
egotrouble.blogspot.com
When I look back at my childhood, my teens and even my early twenties I see this kid that did not really have the balls to take on the challenges that life threw at him. My fragile ego kept me from developing my talents to there full potential thus me as a person. I was this timid and shy guy with not much self-confidence and certainly no womanizer. Had my first real girlfriend at a late age of 19, although my friends thought differently because of some made up stories. Those days I really had to be 100% in love and at ease with a lady to be able to have sex.
Through a friend at the gym where I worked out, I got me a job as a bouncer of a small disco. Because my character is quiet and friendly it might not have been the best suitable job. But this way I could work for two nights a week and pay for my study physiotherapy which I did during the day.
There I was, muscular with a sun bed tan so at least I was tough on the outside. Pleasant side-effect, I had the attention of many beautiful ladies. One night my colleague told me that he had found this pill that made him have very good sex. He did not use the pill with his wife but the more so with the ladies he had on the side. The pill, called Viagra, made sure that he performed like a Stallion every time. At that moment my mind projected these awesome images of me having…. well you can imagine.
Listening to the stories of my colleague and other new found friends I came to see it as a weakness not being able to perform with just any girl I wanted. Thought that the “social standard” of a real man was somebody who could do just that. Having sex with any girl is just not me, but my ego took over and realized that this was the opportunity to be more then I really was. Certainly me, the tough bouncer had to be able to perform whenever I wanted and I had enough girls offering.
It was fantastic! The first time I used Viagra, I took the pill at my house with a glass of water. I was told that I had to take it about 45 minutes before “the act”. Driving to her house I suddenly felt this “tingling” sensation in my body and something getting really hard inside my pants. Holy moly what the fu..? This was great! She opened the door and we went straight into the bedroom. I was hooked. Every time the same. I would take Viagra, my little friend grew bigger then big, pointing straight to heaven and me thinking Thank you lord….well not really ;-)
From then on I started every new relationship this way. Did the relationship last and things got more serious I stopped with the pills. Sometimes it happened that I was out of pills and that my colleague also could not get any. If I needed them the same day, in a tiny bit of panic I tried to get them from other “vague friends”.
One time I had met this woman that I really, really liked. We had dated for a while and tonight was the night, she was ready for the next step. So this night I definitely had to perform, this time I thought it was most important.
I was totally at ease because I knew that I would perform for sure. In the afternoon at home I wanted to put two pills in the pocket of my coat so I would definitely not forget them in the evening as we were supposed to meet at her house. To my terrible surprise, the drawer where I kept them was empty! What? I was so sure that I had one strip of pills left and there are 4 in a strip of pills. What? How was this possible? Again, a bit of panic!
Relax, breath, count to ten and focus on what to do. So I called my colleague but he did not have any and told me they were very hard to come by at the moment. He could not help me this time. Called another “vague friend” but he told me the same thing: hard to come by at the moment and could not help me. Well, panic increased. A lot!! There was not much time left until we were supposed to meet. Sweat outbreak.
I did not know what to do and so I rushed to the other side of town to find me a sex shop
And of course my fears became thru as they did not sell Viagra because it was illegal and you could only get it on a doctors prescription. So I bought all of kind of stuff that was supposed to increase potency. From Spanish Fly to Peruvian jungle herbs and a wonder potion out of Thailand.
When I look back at my childhood, my teens and even my early twenties I see this kid that did not really have the balls to take on the challenges that life threw at him. My fragile ego kept me from developing my talents to there full potential thus me as a person. I was this timid and shy guy with not much self-confidence and certainly no womanizer. Had my first real girlfriend at a late age of 19, although my friends thought differently because of some made up stories. Those days I really had to be 100% in love and at ease with a lady to be able to have sex.
Through a friend at the gym where I worked out, I got me a job as a bouncer of a small disco. Because my character is quiet and friendly it might not have been the best suitable job. But this way I could work for two nights a week and pay for my study physiotherapy which I did during the day.
There I was, muscular with a sun bed tan so at least I was tough on the outside. Pleasant side-effect, I had the attention of many beautiful ladies. One night my colleague told me that he had found this pill that made him have very good sex. He did not use the pill with his wife but the more so with the ladies he had on the side. The pill, called Viagra, made sure that he performed like a Stallion every time. At that moment my mind projected these awesome images of me having…. well you can imagine.
Listening to the stories of my colleague and other new found friends I came to see it as a weakness not being able to perform with just any girl I wanted. Thought that the “social standard” of a real man was somebody who could do just that. Having sex with any girl is just not me, but my ego took over and realized that this was the opportunity to be more then I really was. Certainly me, the tough bouncer had to be able to perform whenever I wanted and I had enough girls offering.
It was fantastic! The first time I used Viagra, I took the pill at my house with a glass of water. I was told that I had to take it about 45 minutes before “the act”. Driving to her house I suddenly felt this “tingling” sensation in my body and something getting really hard inside my pants. Holy moly what the fu..? This was great! She opened the door and we went straight into the bedroom. I was hooked. Every time the same. I would take Viagra, my little friend grew bigger then big, pointing straight to heaven and me thinking Thank you lord….well not really ;-)
From then on I started every new relationship this way. Did the relationship last and things got more serious I stopped with the pills. Sometimes it happened that I was out of pills and that my colleague also could not get any. If I needed them the same day, in a tiny bit of panic I tried to get them from other “vague friends”.
One time I had met this woman that I really, really liked. We had dated for a while and tonight was the night, she was ready for the next step. So this night I definitely had to perform, this time I thought it was most important.
I was totally at ease because I knew that I would perform for sure. In the afternoon at home I wanted to put two pills in the pocket of my coat so I would definitely not forget them in the evening as we were supposed to meet at her house. To my terrible surprise, the drawer where I kept them was empty! What? I was so sure that I had one strip of pills left and there are 4 in a strip of pills. What? How was this possible? Again, a bit of panic!
Relax, breath, count to ten and focus on what to do. So I called my colleague but he did not have any and told me they were very hard to come by at the moment. He could not help me this time. Called another “vague friend” but he told me the same thing: hard to come by at the moment and could not help me. Well, panic increased. A lot!! There was not much time left until we were supposed to meet. Sweat outbreak.
I did not know what to do and so I rushed to the other side of town to find me a sex shop
And of course my fears became thru as they did not sell Viagra because it was illegal and you could only get it on a doctors prescription. So I bought all of kind of stuff that was supposed to increase potency. From Spanish Fly to Peruvian jungle herbs and a wonder potion out of Thailand.